Judging Others
Funny how we tend to forget that we all have blindspots. So easy, to judge others based on the things that they can’t see for themselves, those things that seem ‘obvious’ to us.
” I give up, you mean they can’t see how they’re sabotaging and blocking their lives?” We retort.
Here is the deal, we all have blindspots and unconscious habits or patterns that we are not aware of. It is not the end of the world though, we can all find them and eliminate them
At one point came to a junction and bumped into my blindspot. For so many years by best friend tried to point it out to me. I never saw it, I was too blind to see, so to speak. It was there and it was obvious. I had been in a toxic friendship for way too long. This relationship would have me blocked from any form of communication, be it phone, social media platforms etc. This happened every so often. The real problem here was that I loved too much. I justified it by saying it was just part and parcel of relationships. I would tell myself they are just protecting their “bubble’ not realising it was me who was getting the short straw. A raw bargain.
Imagine chatting to someone and thinking that everything was ok to wake up the next morning to no show.
Disappeared! Kaboom! Now you see me, now you don’t.
This person understood me, and understood perfect timing. Narcissist? Possibly. They would wait for things cool off and just like that they slip their way back to my life (mostly for something) like nothing happened. Never taking the blame, never apologising.
Forgiving yourself for being human is one powerful transformation anyone could ever encounter. I embrace my humanly flaws it is the beauty of what makes me, me. Always listen to the said and the unsaid, to become more aware of your blindspots. Some may be harmless but others just create blockage.
Goodluck to you if it is family.
Remember: Boundaries are meant to protect you. Use them in healthy ways and wisely not to cause unnecessary pain (and evil) to loved ones and yourself.
PS: Mindfulness is a great tool to calm the mind and help us be more aware. Use a coach to bridge the gap between where you are now and where you want to be.
©Nicolle Hanselmann 2021
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