Missed Some Pages of My Life-Major Life Changes

How to Tackle Major Life Changes

As we help each other grow through self-development and life coaching in general, I blog.

And with my blogger’s hat, comes a lot of sharing and responsibility.

Imagine knowing half of your story for years and years,…and years?

Yes, that happened to me.

Only recently, did I discover the other half of my life transforming journey. And, something in me still feels like there might be more to come mmh…

Just in case you don’t know much about me, I have shared most of my stories in my video blogs. One being that, I got so sick in my prime and overacted to the antibiotics given to me, and lost my hearing. I was about 25/26 at the time, the word scary doesn’t cut it.


I have always known and shared about me being on my death bed for about 13 or so days in hospital blah! blah! blah! There after, taken home to be nursed by my mum when it got too expensive. I know, I was in a semi-coma or something of the sort, then learnt how to walk after the whole ordeal.

But the details, not the weeny teeny bit details, the important details were missing.

Semi-coma yes, Oxygen, tick, blood transfusion, tick, learning how to walk again, yes, losing most of my hearing yes, still living it, ok???

Drum roll
Yes, I know moments.

Resuscitation! Yes, I know, resuscitation!

Only learnt of this recently. I would like to be dramatic and go like “Has my whole adulthood been a lieeeeee?” Joking…


Anyway,  I don’t want to wallow in negativity and the past, I do actually appreciate my journey, I would like us too take something from this.

No matter what happened to you in the past, knowingly or unknowingly we ought to seek our purpose.

Let Go, Let God

Major Life Changes

Major changes can occur at any stage of our lives, in the form of sickness, bereavement, loss of earnings, etc. These can be external factors, those forces beyond our control that spiritual people like me sum it as God’s doing. At times we are just “victims” of someone else change an example would separation and divorce to kids or family.

Back to my story, I never knew the other half of my narrative as it affected the other members. The “victims” of my change. I could play victim here, flip it and say that it was selfish of them not to tell me. No, it is their story too. They officially became a living proof of being a victim of someone else’s major change.

Their story too

My sister watched me being brought back to life. The doctors and the nurses were in such a frenzy of panic that they never sent her away, I know, she stayed to watch, I don’t know much, not my story.

On the other hand, my mum thought it best for me never to find out, I know, again don’t know much, not my story. I only know she had asked that we don’t discuss it. This is a woman who was raw. She had had to go through almost losing her second daughter only after a couple of years of losing her first one. Yeah! I know!

Working through major life changes

Most of us need a grieving process quiet similar to bereavement after a major change.

  • Allow yourself time, give time, time, and forgive yourself. It is a very important process. This is your closure, a big deal saying goodbye to an old self. But, don’t mop forever. Don’t dwell on it, start living again.
  • A time comes when you just have to dust yourself and ask yourself what it is that you learnt.
  • Know yourself and how you like to deal with things.
  • Learn about stages of bereavement.


  • Change is inevitable, and like they say nothing is constant but change.
  • Accept the cards life played you and move forward. Keep a close-knit family (and friends) to go through the transition with, or seek professional help.

Is life not a hundred times too short for us to stifle ourselves?

Friedrich Nietzsche

Questions to ask yourself to create your ideal life


  • What is your ideal (dream) life?
  • Is there someone you admire? Are they approachable to mentor you?
  • Where do you want to live?  With whom?
  • The sort of line of work you want to pursue.
  • What would you do to make your life fun again?
  • What would a normal day look like in your ideal life? Visualise this with all the details you could possibly add.

All the best!


©nicollehanselmann 2021


Blog Photo Credits

Kaboompics .com from Pexels

Leah Kelley from Pexels

Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels

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